Tuesday, March 09, 2010

Emotional Overload pt. 1

So Sunday night during church, I had to get up & leave because I got upset. The whole weekend had been difficult, but during that time, I was mentally going through my jewelry box, thinking of what was in there. (I know, that's not what I was supposed to be thinking about during church.)

All of a sudden, it hit me: Bigmother's baby ring! I have had my grandmother's baby ring for a long time and have successfully not lost it, so to think that I may have lost it this way was just too much. Chris was home with Katie, who was sick, which was yet another reason for stress, so I immediately called him to have him check in Gracie's jewelry box. He thought he found it, thankfully, but we weren't sure until I got home and could make sure that's what it was. I am grateful that her ring was safe. I am grateful for the friend who knew me well enough to know that I needed someone to follow me and cry with me.

They did get my other grandmother's (Maw Maw) watch which was special to me. She actually let me have it before she passed away. After she passed away, I was blessed to be able to have a pendant that had a small diamond in it. The diamond had originally been in her engagement ring. To think that someone has that is very upsetting. It wasn't a large diamond; it won't bring anyone much money, but it was special to me. I've always kinda wished I had her garnet ring. My cousin, Andrea, has it. I am so thankful she does.

I had a 'Mother's Bracelet' that I cherished. It was sterling silver with Gracie's name on it orginally. With the birth of Katie, her name was added, and then Ellie's name was added most recently. I loved that bracelet. They apparently swept that into the pillowcase, too. I mean really, what are they going to do with it? They probably threw it away somewhere; don't see how they could sell it with those 3 specific names on it. It was worth a small bit monetarily, but it was customized to be for me. Who else has 3 daughters with my daughters' names, so I don't see how they could sell it?!

I got up this morning to take a shower & dry my hair before Chris left. I never do that, and it was about 45 minutes earlier than I needed to get up, but I could hardly stand the thought of getting in the shower with him not home. Not yet. Today is the first time I've been home alone without him other than a short while when he went to the store last night. I can hardly bring myself to leave the main part of the house where I can see the back door. I am making sure to have windows & blinds down here open where I can see out and they can see me in here. I stood at the front door and literally stared at the yard guys working on my neighbor's yard. Just in case. I wanted them to know that I was here and that I was watching them. It's probably not fair to them, but right now I find myself suspecting just about everyone I see in the neighborhood.

I'm sure I will say more later, but God's words are better right now:

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10


SG said...

Earth hold no treasures.... h that is so hard. I'm really sorry. It's the violation more than the stuff I imagine. I'm so sorry this had to happen to your family!

Gretchen said...

I am so sorry you are having to deal with this. As a kid Adam and I came home to the place completely ransacked. We were scared for a long time after that as we always came home to an empty house. They eventually find out it was a couple of women posing as a cleaning company and coming into any house they could through the back. I hope you are able to find some of the pieces, especially those that hold meaning for you.

Jennifer Reinsch said...

I am sorry you guys had to go through this. I know it makes you so much jumpier in general, and makes you feel out of place in your own home.